Bring Me Back

I'm a very forward moving, busy person.  I get stressed out easily, but very quickly can talk myself down.  Today started with loading 5 little ones in the car at 7:30 to get my older 4 to "Family School"  which most of you know as Home School.    As soon as I walked back in the door I dove into my stack of paperwork.  I immediately start rattling off in my head the bazillion things I need to get done.  Very quickly I had myself in a mess of stress!  Early afternoon I ran to pick the kids up, and a bunch of other errands.  On the way home the kids asked if we could play at the park tonight, I started to say no.  I stopped myself, and told them of course we could.  These little people ground me.  They help me remember that all of that other stuff gets done, and that these days are going to be gone so fast.  So we played, we played for a couple of hours.  Everything else didn't matter, in fact we had so much fun we almost went back to the park again later tonight.  Tomorrow my littles go with their daddy.  I cry every time on the way back to my house.  I cry for them, that their little worlds are crumbling.  Their new life isn't what I would have ever chosen for them, and at the same time I know in their new life they will be able to see true love.  I'm so blessed to have them to ground me, and bring me back. They finally get to have the mom that I have always wanted to be!!